Why was 6 afraid of 7?

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

allteenhumor:

Because 7 ate 9.

Why did 7 eat 9?

Because you need 3 squared meals a day.

The police arrested 3 as well as 7, why?

Because 3 was the root of the problem.

i don’t know why this doesn’t have thousands of notes, but that is unacceptable

karmawasteland:

goes to a cemetary only to get punned by dead people

Source: tf2playernames

tatsumi-rin:

Japanese is a beautiful language

batmanisagatewaydrug:

batmanisagatewaydrug:

can’t wait for the final boss battle of duolingo when you fight the 50 foot owl armed with nothing but your wits, a sword, and your shaky grasp of verb conjugations

oh my god… duel lingo

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

did u know: according to scientists, in October the mitochondria turns into the frightochondria and becomes the haunted house of the cell

followthebluebell:

kleppy02:

followthebluebell:

fimbry-talks:

Love when my cat flings himself into the air after a toy, but he has no style. Straight up ragdoll physics.

One day i want to take a video of Yardstick straight-up hurling himself into the void. Cats have no conception that there is a future. There is just now and the jingly toy.

Your cat’s name is Yardstick?

He has three feet.

anothersleepysheepie:

daysofmyown:

safety-officer-barto:

badsciencejokes:

There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.

Only a fraction of you will understand this.

lock your doors and cross yourselves, we are in the presence of

saunteredvaguelydownward:

buttsonthebeach:

skarchomp:

NOSFERRETU

ALWAYS REBLOG

@ferretsonice

earlploddington:

supersaiyansadie:

thIS IS THE BEST PUN EVER AND IF YOU DON’T AGREE GET OUT

honestly i didn’t realise that was a pun st first bc English Officers in the first world war were just Like That

Source: ambereliza